Why are so many people drinking the GREEN kool-aid? (And why are the rest of us being forced to?)

Let me tell you my theory on the Anthropogenic-Global-Warming-Gone-Wild situation. In the normal course of events, there is always SOME group of people who get some sort of bug up their tuchas about something. But this big bug is getting shoved up the collective tuchases of the rest of us, because there are A LOT of people who have embraced this ginormous bug. Why? Why are so many people so infatuated with this metaphorical Gregor Samsa? Well, here is my theory:

1. There have ALWAYS been “chickens little”: The sky is falling! The sky is falling! Remember Y2K? The planes were going to fall out of the sky! The cars would stop running! Our bank accounts would be wiped out! Before that, 1984? (Some Jews were really gaga since the Jewish year was also the root word for “destruction.” Tashmad? Tashmag? Something like...) Going all the way back, throughout human history. The WORLD IS GOING TO END! The END is NEAR!! They can be broken down into two groups of people: the saner crowd--who function on a daily basis, but buy into the latest “world-is-gong-to-end” fad; and the Hale-Bopp crowd, the real nutjobs. Both of these subgroups embraced the AGW theory with both arms, all the heart, and have held on tight...
   
   
2. The treehugger crowd--another crowd that has existed for a long time. And to a certain extent, has done a world of good. Thanks to John Muir, we have some great national parks. They did help force us to clean up the environment in the sixties and seventies. This is the largest group because everyone loves trees--so treehuggers range across a spectrum from Republicans for Environmental Protection to Earth Liberation Front. The difference between the right end of the spectrum and the not-so-right end of the spectrum is that those of us among the conservative treehuggers balance human needs and reality against what those at the lefter end of the spectrum want. (e.g., the ratio of area for drilling oil in Arctic National Wildlife Refuge to the are of the WHOLE ANWR is roughly comparable to the area of Dulles to the entire state of South Carlina. And so we say, “Drill, baby, drill!”) Now, to a certain extent, some conservatives have jumped on the AGW bandwagon, but the further left you move along that spectrum, the more people have swallowed the kool-aid... (And the saner people are the ones now jumping OFF the bandwagon...)
   
   
3. The Communists have been in a bit of a funk since the demise of the Soviet Union. THAT “experiment” didn't work, but that didn't dissuade them from their fantasy of a New World Communist Order. Along came AGW, and they adapted. Read my “Green is the New Red” from my slumbering blog. Anyhow, if you read that, you can see how they jumped on the Green Bandwagon, and seriously took it over. And REALLY steered it in that direction. (Check out the 10 Planks of the Communist Manifest comparison at my blog!)
   
   
4. And of course, the people who have found a way to make money HAND OVER FIST on selling the People of World some new snake oil: Al Gore, GE, Kleiner-Perkins... This is a small slice of the people pie, but we're looking at GAZILLIONS of DOLLARS tied up in this. They are terriers (no pun intended) who will not let go of this... 'Cause it's a loooooooooooooot of sumullions!
   
   
5. People looking for meaning in their lives, or some sense of mysticism, or something like that. These are the folks who probably went to church once or twice a year as children, or who were were brought to the smorgasbord of religious tasties by hippie-dippie parents who were members of the “God-of-the-Month.” (“This month we'll learn all about Shiva and Vishnu; next month we'll focus on Cernunnos, and after that, we'll see...”) Or who were dragged to church every week, but for whom it was just a painful affair: they grow up, equating Christianity with the cause of their childhood misery. (Or Judaism, for the Jewish crowd.) Not realizing that the REAL religion has little to do with a dull pastor, priest or rabbi. (Unfortunately, God doesn't personally vet all those getting ordained. Some clunkers slip by.) So, these people are looking for a religious experience. In the sixties and seventies, they became Hari Krishas. Today, their bible is “An Inconvenient Truth,” their God-dess is Gaia, and Al Gore is her prophet. They have made this whole thing a religion. And if you don't believe me...
   
   
6. The people who get swept on in the latest fad. Usually college kids. In the 50's they were swallowing goldfish and stuffing phone booths. In the sixties, war protesting. Whatever shows that they are ON TOP of the VERY LATEST THING. This can include the fashionista type for whom Manolo Blahniks are soooo last year... Whatever is IN, or NOW, or CHIC, that is the train they get on, and AGW was the IN-NOW-CHIC train they boarded... Witness the Hollywood crowd...

Anyhow...

All six of these groups have been ganging up on the rest of us. And with this almost unprecedented convergence of divergent groups, they have more power, money, organization, and connections than ANY single one of the individual subgroups had EVER had (outside of the Communists in the Soviet Union. And again, look how THAT turned out...) And lo, we now have “Cap'n Trade” being shoved down our throats, and the EPA getting more power than ever, and so on, and so on and so on... And so on...

(In an interesting irony, it is the people from Group 2 are the ones who are more likely to peel away from the AGW nonsense. They have less of a horse in that race. And for the most part, they tend to be a more sane, realistic crowd--except, of course, those people further left on the treehugger spectrum... and the ELF crowd is just plain, unsalted NUTS!!!)

Save the Planet! Vote Republican!